It's odd how so many people from my past aren't what I thought they were. Most of the people I wanted to impress when I was growing up turned out to be unworthy of my efforts. And the people I took for granted turned out to be the people I needed most.

The truly sad part is that you can't go back in time and set things right. You can't stop yourself from hurting the people you truly cared about or hurting yourself to impress the unworthy ones. You can learn from your mistakes; I definitely have, but the consequences of those mistakes never go away.

Now I do whatever I can to avoid making those mistakes. I give people the benefit of the doubt. I'm polite even to people who are terribly rude (maybe they just had a bad day). I take time to figure out who is truly important to me, and I make an effort to let them know I care while doing my best to keep from smothering them. At the same time, I'm very cautious. I've learned that if somebody says "trust me," you generally shouldn't. I've learned that if somebody says they care about you, pay attention to their actions, not their words.

I still catch myself wishing I could press the do-over button, though. Imagine how much easier life could be with one of those.

Labels: My Life