Realizing Your Significance
Updated April 28, 2007
I'm often asked, "How do I make myself feel significant?"
My answer, "Realize that you already are significant."
Each of us is significant. The moment you came into existence, you became significant. The universe has changed because you are in it. Wonderful things are happening right now because you are here, even if you don't realize that they are happening. Even your mistakes, even the most heinous mistakes, result in wonderful things over time. (This doesn't mean that you should be proud of unforgivable heinous mistakes, such as abusing somebody, but you can forgive yourself for making them.)
Ways to Realize Your Significance
Write Your Life Resume
Sit down with a blank journal and make a list of everything that you have done in your life, good and bad. Start at the beginning. Go back to your earliest memories and list as many things as you can. (This isn't something you should expect to complete in one sitting. It is an ongoing process. As long as you're alive, there's something to add.)
Next to each item on your list, write down how your actions resulted in something wonderful. Example:
Action: I gave flowers to my secret crush in third grade.
Result: I gave that person an ego boost and possibly helped to boost his/her self-esteem.Action: I hit my brother, nearly sending him to the hospital, when I was a teenager.
Result: I realized I never wanted to hurt another person again and learned to express my anger in healthier ways. I've tried to encourage others to control their anger, too.
Start Helping Others
If you want a quick way to realize that you are important, do something to help other people. Find an organization that calls to you, and volunteer: schools, an animal shelter, a library, senior centers, hospitals, etc. Offer to provide your professional services completely for free to somebody who needs it and can't afford it. Visit with a lonely neighbor (start by giving cookies or other goodies to every person in your neighborhood, and talk to every person; trust me, you'll find somebody who needs a friend). Mentor a kid who seems to need a bit of guidance (don't be preachy or authoritative, just be a friend). Give out bits of advice whenever you can (I've received some of the best advice from talking to people in grocery stores and at bus stops). Look at, smile at, and compliment strangers frequently (this can even help reduce your chances of being a victim of a crime, but keep your guard up just in case). Adopt a homeless animal (never buy a pet). Adopt a child (take child development and parenting classes first). If you're feeling extra ambitious, start a non-profit organization or start a political career with the intention of changing the world for the better.
The world is in dire need of people who will help others. Be one of them.
Create and Discover
Think about amazing individuals throughout history. Chances are, on your list of amazing historical figures are a few artists, inventors, and explorers, along with the exalted class of people who are known for helping others. Sometimes we remember the creation or discovery more than the person who created or discovered it, but if it weren't for that amazing person, the creation wouldn't exist, and the discovery would go on undiscovered.
Example: Van Gogh. He ultimately believed he was a failure and was financially broke when he died. It wasn't until after his death, when his family discovered his collection of paintings, that he gained fame and wealth from his creations. He felt totally insignificant throughout his life, but he wasn't insignificant at all. He was actually one of the most important figures in the world of modern art. He just didn't know it.
Like Van Gogh, you may be an amazing historical figure and not even know it. Start creating something: art, music, literature, cinema, buildings, gardens, etc. Start inventing something. Start exploring the world, the cosmos. Start discovering (we could use a cure for cancer or perhaps just a cure for procrastination). Let your passion be your guide.
If you are passionate about it, chances are somebody else in the world will be passionate about it too, but don't lose hope if you don't actually get to meet that like-minded passionate person. Maybe they haven't been born yet. Maybe they won't come into this world until after your death. Maybe you won't get the privilege of signing autographs, but perhaps generations of children and adults may adore you as they read about you in history books. Maybe you're just a mind ahead of your time.
Also, don't let your insecurities get in the way. Dare to be brave enough to make mistakes (even Picasso's mistakes sell at auctions).